It is approximately 3:00AM and I am pissed. I have realized, after a long day of terribly annoying shit that I may or may not suffer a massive heart attack if I do not remove some of the redundant bullshit that inhabits my life. Furthermore, today has solidified the fact that this world is chaos and many everyday things were sent here to pester me .
#1. Fuck Peanuts. What is happening with the peanut recall? I am now terrified of eating anything that may have at one point in time, been stored in the same building as said contaminated peanuts. I can now add another phobia to the existing laundry list of debilitating fears. Great.
#2. Fuck Lighters. Not one, BUT two of them broken in my hands today. One of the few joys of cigarette smoking is how quickly it can be done. Simply pull a cigarette out, flick your Bic and there you go. Delightful nicotine goodness. I would like to meet the person who invented the clear, multicolored, cheap as dirt lighters. The " 3 for a dollar" gimmick should be changed to "get 3, because god knows you'll need at least 3 to light up." Thanks a lot.
#3. Fuck Taco Bell. For years, yes years, I have patronized this quick and disgusting establishment and I have now been let down for the last time. Kids meals : two tacos, nacho's and cheese and a delightful toy to accompany you whilst you fill your body with toxins. Not anymore. Now, you get two tacos, cinnamon twists and a children's PC game. I really just wanted to nachos :( .
And finally,
#4. Fuck a Duvet. The idea of a duvet is to cover and protect your down comforter. I have several different types of duvets in my lifetime and have hated all of them. The newest one has buttons on the side, 8 in total. Well 4 of them popped off the first night and the two remaining ones and get fucked. I literally woke up in a sweaty panic, tangled up inside of this thing. I would like to stuff who ever created this $80, half open, poorly constructed piece of fabric - INSIDE of my duvet. Good luck getting out, hope you've got some extra time. My duvet is now in 3 pieces. Yes, I tore it to free myself. I panicked.
Well that's enough of that. I am obviously quite disgruntled. The only thing left to happen now is to have Cassie and Ivan come to Michigan to cheer me up. So, lets get on with it.
Hope all is well.
Rachel
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
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3 comments:
Rachel Hogan!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where have you been all my life?
I agree about the peanuts though. I was going to order some peanut butter girl scout cookies today and was like- "eeek! umm...no, nope, better not." irksome. but no need to work yourself into anxious fits; just lay of PB and J's for a minute.
keep posting! I miss you!!
I just reread your duvet rant. you're a truly hilarious bitch.
I also just reread the duvet rant for the 3rd time in an hour.
duvet covers are dumb.
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